A fascinating pattern that I have been working on within myself and with all the participants in my Ancestral Echoes program is one called systemic loyalties. This is a pattern, usually non coherent that we maintain in order to show our love and loyalty either to our family system in general or a particular member in the system. For example to be loyal to the system, a member may find themselves constantly over-whelmed with life, having money but not much, are always struggling, can’t succeed or get sick. It always appears to be mysterious because the person is doing their very best but can’t seem to make anything work for them. Their loyalty pattern may be very hidden.
All living systems form a kind of group mind that has its own rules to basically preserve the nature of the group. It gives the group a definition and a boundary. Our very primary need to belong to a group like our family will cause us to do what it takes to obey the unspoken rules of the group. You can witness examples of the group preserving it’s definition when parents or elders say things like “We don’t do that in this family” or “Our family always does….”. If you don’t happen to agree with what ever the rule is either you pay the price and feel excluded or suffer to belong as your true needs are not met.
There are also loyalties created when we want to maintain a bond with a family member such as parents, or a favorite relative. If a favorite cousin for example, always failed in business, and was excluded from the family in some way we may take on their fate to give them a place in the system or share their burden by also having a business that only fails. In another example, – an intelligent young woman avoids the higher education she desires to remain loyal to her parents who do not want their station in life jeopardized – “No one in this family will ever go to university”
To overcome the loyalty that holds us back, we must first become aware of its existence and the price we are paying for maintaining it, contact the love available inside the loyalty and then replace it with a coherent pattern of loyalty. We must then resonate with having the permission of our family system’s energy to let go of the old pattern and adopt the new one.
Without a doubt it takes persistence to recognize and clear this pattern but is rewarded with a profound sense of inner freedom as a result.
What problems do you face that may be the result of an invisible systemic loyalty?