The joy of committing to doing healing work of any kind – traditional therapy or repatterning is the anticipation that the problems in our lives will dissipate or be resolved and we will be happier. Yet many people I meet – clients, colleagues or friends complain that after doing all kinds of work on themselves they feel as though nothing has changed. The same problems are seeping back into their lives arriving in different packages or circumstances but essentially the same. They are as miserable as ever.
I would argue that a great deal has changed and like a new app that’s been downloaded – needs to be installed. If the installation requires more power, or time to complete, and we are on that treadmill of ‘very busy’ chances are we’ll put off the installation for a later time. Ask yourself what new patterns do you want for your life, that you can already visualize but have not yet installed? What do you need to physically do to install the new patterns?
Installing a new pattern often means changing our behavior or taking new personal action we could not do before. Sometimes taking the new action is tiring because its like using muscles we have not used in awhile. You have to persevere. Taking new actions can initially feel weird, uncomfortable or awkward or just plain wrong because it goes against everything that you have experienced to date. Personally I think this is where most of us lose the gains we have made in our healing transformation.
Its one thing to understand ourselves and clear our patterns but quite another to now become the new way of being. Everyone wants to be the next lottery jackpot winner – but what if that happened for you? How would your life really change? Could you handle it? Would you loose it all or become your new ideal self (See this article in my local paper).
If we don’t resonate with our shifts in consciousness and transformation or literally get ‘on’ that frequency, chances are we’ll spiral down a bit to our old non coherent way of being because if feels familiar and comfortable. However, make no mistake you have changed. Resuming a lower energy state will now feel really miserable because unlike before, you now have and may have briefly experienced the new energy state or pattern. Its what you have always wanted. You can taste it! You can see yourself on the path ahead of you with your desired image. But you are not quite there as yet.
Integration of our healing work is key to moving on to the new desired pattern – a place where we are living our true potential. Integration typically requires some reflection and new personal actions. Here are a few suggestions:
1. Reflect on a situation you have already worked on trying to change in your life. What new insights do you have about this pattern? What new understanding do you have? Going forward to adopt the new energy pattern, in what ways will your behavior be different? What actions will you stop taking? What new actions are you committed to doing?
2. Reflect on how your brain is firing. When your pattern surfaces how do you process it now compared to before? I call this reflection ‘Thinking About Thinking’. For example, my old negative belief for a number of new things was “I am responsible and need to take care of this problem that actually belongs to someone else”. My new pattern is “I am responsible for myself.” When I observe myself thinking that way I am then integrating the new way of behaving.
3. Make a list of small actions you can take to anchor your new pattern and act on them daily. If your new pattern is to have more connection with others your action may be to call a friend once a day and make plans with someone once a week. If your new pattern is that you are a writer, your new action may be that you write every day. What new pattern are you ready to install? What new action(s) will you be taking?